Until My Dying Day
by SakeTeriyaki
Summary: After recieving a mysterious letter from Satine written before her death, Christian searches for the truth.
1. A Secret Revealed

Christian whipped the crisp paper out of the typewriter. He had fufilled his promise to Satine by writing their story. He slumped into the chair, staring at the first few words he had written: "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." He threw the paper onto the bed, where it joined the rest of the story, and reached for his familiar bottle of Absinthe, the only thing that had been his friend in the past five months since Satine's death. Taking a swig, he stared out the window and gazed upon the crippled Moulin Rouge. For months he had refused to look at it, for fear that the memories would return. This time was different though. As his eyes looked over the millions of lightbulbs and the rusted marquee, a warm and friendly feeling came over him. Glancing to the side of the marquee, he saw the gigantic elephant where he and Satine had first kissed. Tears came to his eyes as he remembered singing, "I hope you don't mind that I put down in words, how wonderful life is now you're in the world." to his beloved as she looked at him in awe.  
  
A knock on the door startled Christian, and he wiped away the tears as he silently said, "Who's there?" "Christian, it's Chocolat. Can I come in?" said an all-too-familiar voice.  
  
The door creaked open, and Christian could see the dark dancer who looked out for Satine, the one who had caught her when she fell from her trapeze during "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend" routine. Chocolat entered the small, paper-strewn room and closed the door. He stood against the door with a melancholy look on his face.  
  
"I don't mean to bother you, but there's something I think you should know..." Chocolat said quietly, looking at the floor. "What is it? Is everything alright?" Christian asked, not moving from his desk.  
  
Chocolat held out a rose-colored hatbox with Satine's name embroidered in a silvery thread on the lid. As he moved towards Christian to give him the box, he spoke while tears streamed down his face, "We finished clearing out Mademoiselle Satine's belongings and we were about to sell this. Nini opened it and instead of finding a hat, there was another box inside with your name on it. We wanted you to have it."  
  
Christian rose out of his chair slightly and took the box from Chocolat's outstretched hands. He thanked him, and Chocolat left. Christian set the box on his desk and ran his fingers through his hair, sighing. He looked around his room with a look of disgust and began to clean up. Dozens of empty Absinthe bottles, candle wax, torn paper, and dirty dishes littered every orafice of his quarters. Within two hours, the room looked just as it had when Christian first moved in. He turned towards his desk, spotting the hatbox. Bringing it with him to the bed, he ran his fingertips over Satine's name, remembering a million things about her. Reaching into the box, he removed a plain brown cardboard box with "Christian" written on it sloppily, as if it had been written in a hurry.  
  
Ripping open the box, Christian caught a whiff of Satine's perfume rising from it. Pausing for a few moments, Christian closed his eyes and remembered how beautiful Satine always looked. She was always perfect to Christian, even when she was crying and her mascara ran down her cheeks, leaving black streaks on her face. Looking into the brown box, he saw a small vial of the sweet perfume. He picked it out of the box and opened the lid, taking in the subtle notes of vanilla, rose, and oak. Gently placing the perfume aside, he reached into the box and retrieved a pink feather. At first, Christian wanted to throw it out, but then he realized that the feather had come from Satine's outfit from Christian's first night at the Moulin Rouge. It too smelled like Satine's perfume. Christian pulled out ten other items before finding an envelope at the bottom of the box: three gold rings, a black hand fan, a diamond necklace, a small picture of Sarah Bernhardt, a wilted rose, two pairs of earrings, and a five-franc note.  
  
Placing the items with the perfume and the feather, Christian picked up the envelope. It wasn't sealed, but his name was written on the front. He leaned back on his bed, against the pillows, and began to read the letter inside:  
  
"Dearest Christian, If you are reading this, then my plan is starting to work. As I write, you are still asleep and it is almost seven o'clock in the morning. The sun rose about an hour ago, and it's rays are reflecting off you're handsome face. I know that you will soon be waking up and we will spend the day in each other's arms, but I just wanted you to know that I will always love you. Because I love you, I cannot lie to you anymore. I know that you are probably mourning me, but I want you to know that I am not dead..."  
  
Christian stared at the letter in shock and disbelief. She wasn't dead?! He continued to read.  
  
"When we first met, almost five months ago in June, I found out that the Moulin Rouge was going through financial problems due to Harold's over- spending on redecoration and electrification of the nightclub. Since I was the star courtesan, there was pressure on me to sleep with rich financiers who might in turn give their money to Harold so we could stay open. There was talk about a very rich Duke, but we never knew that he'd take an interest in the Moulin Rouge, but we don't need to go into that story again. Anyway, I was feeling cheap and used when I met you, but you turned my world around and I found reason to live. I don't want to keep our love a secret anymore, and I've come up with a plan to save us. With the tips that I get, I've paid the doctor and Marie to make people believe that I have consumption. On the opening night of our play, I will 'die' in your arms. Don't worry darling. I don't know when you are reading this, but I want you to know that I will be waiting at the Bar Absinthe on April 20, 1900. You will find me at table number 3, but I cannot guarantee if I will be wearing a disguise or not. I love you and I am waiting for you. -Satine"  
  
His eyes wide with surprise and shock, Christian stared at the date on the letter. Was Satine really alive? Was this a trick? 


	2. The Search Begins

He looked at the door where a faded calender hung. Yes, it was April, but what day? Christian hurriedly ran upstairs and knocked on Toulouse's door, still holding the letter. The door swung open after a few knocks and Christian peeked inside. Beautiful paintings decorated the walls, and easels were set up with half-completed pictures. Toulouse and his friends were nowhere in sight.  
  
"Satie? Toulouse? Is anyone here?" Christian yelled as he walked into the room. While stopping to look at a painting of Satine, Christian heard whispers coming from one of the adjoining rooms. He quickly ran towards the sound and saw Toulouse, drinking a glass of Absinthe and looking at some papers.  
  
"Toulouse!" Christian practically screamed as he entered the room. "Christian? Is that reawy you?" said Toulouse as he set the papers down and faced Christian. Handing Toulouse the letter, Christian took a seat on a nearby box, waiting for Toulouse's response.  
  
"Apriw 20? That's tomorrow! Are you going to go?" Toulouse asked with a twinkle in his eye and a smile on his face. "I don't know if I should, it might be a trick. But if I don't go and it's not a trick, then what?!" Christian said with a puzzled look. "I think you shouwd go, Christian. Satine might actuawy be tewing the truth!" Toulouse responded, hobbeling over to his friend.  
  
Christian thanked Toulouse and went back to his place, his mind filled with thoughts of what tomorrow would bring. The night was coming, and Christian could see streaks of purple and gold in the clouds behind the Eiffel Tower. Lighting a few candles, Christian went back to the bed and gently placed the items back in the hatbox, all except for the letter. Retrieving his coat from a chair nearby, he placed the letter in the pocket, threw on the coat, and walked outside. It had been months since he had ventured outside of his haven, and the world around him was changing. The infamous Paris nightlife had gone from a flood to a trickle, the prostitutes seemed much more ragged and older then they were before, and the faces of Christian's bohemian brothers seemed sad and cold. Looking around, he starts to sing Cat Steven's "On the Road to Find Out" as he walks through the streets...  
  
Well I left my happy home to see what I could find out I left my folk and friends with the aim to clear my mind out Well I hit the rowdy road and many kinds I met there Many stories told me of the way to get there  
  
Chorus So on and on I go, the seconds tick the time out There's so much left to know, and I'm on the road to find out  
  
Well in the end I'll know, but on the way I wonder Through descending snow, and through the frost and thunder I listen to the wind come howl, telling me I have to hurry I listen to the robin's song saying not to worry  
  
Chorus  
  
Then I found myself alone, hopin' someone would miss me Thinking about my home, and the last woman to kiss me, kiss me But sometimes you have to moan when nothing seems to suit you But nevertheless you know you're locked towards the future  
  
Chorus 3x 


	3. The Meeting

Dawn had started to creep over the looming buildings of Paris when Christian returned to his home. He had walked around the city the night before, thinking about what the next day would bring. With rings around his eyes and the hands of his watch on the hour of 6, he sleepily climbed into bed, hoping to catch a few hours of much needed sleep.  
  
A few hours later, which only seemed like a few minutes to Christian, he awoke, got dressed, and made his way to the Bar Absinthe. He sat at a table close to table number 3, as not to appear too anxious. Slumped over a glass of absinthe, he listened to a nearby guitarist playing a sad and darkened version of "Children of the Revolution". It was about 12:30 in the afternoon, and Satine had not shown up yet. Taking a sip of his green beverage, he watched as people of many different ethnicities and appearances walk past. Many of them he had seen before when he ventured out to buy more alcohol. He also saw the tired and familiar faces of some of the Moulin Rouge dancers who were now unemployed. Finishing his drink, he noticed a change in the air, and he smelled a familiar perfume floating towards him. Setting some money on the table, Christian arose from his seat and looked in the direction where the perfume was coming from. Walking towards the bar was a tall, raven-haired woman dressed in a fashionable dark blue dress, carrying a parasol and a purse, with delicate pearl bracelets on her gloved hands and a dark blue hat on her head. She appeared to be a lady of breeding, and the people at the bar began to talk amongst themselves when she asked to be seated at table number 3.  
  
Christian, filled with nervousness, slowly walked towards the woman, afraid of what would happen. "Excuse me Mademoiselle," said Christian as he stood in front of her, "But may I buy you a drink?" "You're very bold, Monsieur. But yes, you may." the woman replied without raising her head.  
  
Christian signaled to the bartender and took a seat across from the woman. Something in her voice seemed very familiar. He was about to speak when the woman raised her head and looked him directly in the eye.  
  
"I believe you were expecting me." she said with an intimate tone.  
  
Christian's breath escaped him, and he tried to speak, but no words came to him. It was her! It was Satine in disguise! Soon, he shook off the shock and began to speak.  
  
"Satine?!" he asked, hoping that he wasn't hallucinating. "Shhhhh! No one is to know who I am, Christian. No one. I had to see you again." Satine said, looking around cautiously. "My darling, I cannot believe that it is really you! I got your letter and at first I didn't want to believe it because I thought it was a trick and that you were really dead. I love you so much and now nothing can come between--" Christian blurted out, but Satine interrupted him. "Christian, you've got to help me. I need to start the next phase of my plan. But if you're going to help me, you must call me by my acting name, Honora Blanc." Satine said quickly as the bartender brought two glasses of absinthe.  
  
Christian nodded, looking into Satine's eyes. He would do anything for her, and he was ready to help her with every challenge given to her. What lay ahead for the couple would test the strength of their love in more ways than one. 


	4. The Meeting Continues

Satine took a small sip of her absinthe and set her parasol and purse on the table. Christian sat across from her, staring with a star-struck look in his eyes. She looked absolutely beautiful to him, and her eyes sparkled like diamonds. He could see hints of her red roots peaking under her hat, and that added to her charm. Christian closed his eyes and sipped his drink, remembering how she looked the first time he had seen her, suspended in the air and singing.  
  
"Christian? Christian! Are you okay?" Satine asked, bringing Christian back into the world. With tears building in his eyes, Christian looked into Satine's eyes. "Why'd you leave me like that? I thought you were dead, and I mourned you for months! I was ready to die, I missed you so much!" Christian practially yelled, tears streaming down his face.  
  
Satine grabbed a lace hankie out of her purse and dabbed Christian's face with it before speaking. "I had no choice but to go away! Nini and her friends were beginning to badger me about it, and I knew that I had to escape before anything happened. If my plan had failed, I would have had to marry the Duke or spend the rest of my life at the Moulin Rouge!"  
  
Christian shook his head, "So what have you been doing since then? You look like you're fine on your own now."  
  
Satine took another sip of her absinthe and sat back in the chair before telling her story,  
  
"After Marie took me off the stage when I was 'dead', I changed my clothes and grabbed some suitcases that I had packed weeks before. Marie and I quickly ran to her apartment a few blocks away from the theatre. I cried for weeks after that, because I wanted so much to let you know that I was safe, but I risked letting Zidler and the Duke finding me. As you know, the Moulin Rouge soon went out of business, and I knew that I was safe to start a new life. I dyed my hair black, sold some of my things, and moved to a small flat next to the Eiffel Tower. Before I knew it, I had acting jobs lined up at the theatre in town there and people knew me as Honora Blanc, the delicate Parisian flower."  
  
Christian sat back in his chair, mentally figuring out what Satine was saying as she continued.  
  
"The entire time that I was in Paris, I dreamed of when we would be together again. It was the only thing that kept me alive when the shows were over and the parties had ended. I knew that you still loved me, and I hope that you can forgive me."  
  
"I don't know Satine, my life ended when you went away. I was ready to spend the rest of my life in my room, thinking about you." Christian said, looked down.  
  
"Christian, you must let go. I'm ready to start a new life, and I need you in it." Satine whispered as she grasped Christian's hand, "Please forgive me."  
  
Christian put his hand over Satine's and they met in a passionate kiss. The world spun around them, and the only thing they could see was each other. When their lips parted, Christian smiled at Satine.  
  
"What's the plan?" he said with a twinkle in his eye. "We can't discuss it here, let's go somewhere else." Satine said, placing a few francs on the table and standing up. Christian held out his arm for her as she grabbed her purse and opened her parasol. She put her arm through his and the two headed for his apartment. 


	5. Memories

Inside Christian's apartment, Satine was carefully taking off her hat and gloves as Christian retrieved the hatbox from his bed. He set it on a nearby table as Satin's dark waves of hair cascaded down her back and she walked to the table to sit down.  
  
"I can't believe that you still have this old thing! I thought for certain it would be sold!" Satine exclaimed as she and Christian sat down. "Chocolat delivered it to me just yesterday, and the letter was inside." Christian explained, pushing the box towards Satine.  
  
She carefully opened the box and removed the articles, taking time to look at each one.  
  
"These things were what I wanted to come back to, if I ever came back. Each of the items represent something." Satine said, sighing. "Like what darling?" Christian asked quietly.  
  
Satine picked up the perfume, taking a small sniff of it before speaking, "This was given to me by Harold, when I first got started as a dancer. It was a birthday gift, my eighteenth to be exact. This is the original bottle, but I had many more to wear all the time. I kept this to remember my youth." She set the perfume down and eyed the feather. "I guess you know what this came from," she said with a laugh, "This was the nicest costume that Marie ever made for me. I knew it would be one of the first things sold when I went, so I kept the feather to remember it."  
  
Christian picked up the rings, "I remember these. You always wore them." "Yes, they were my mother's rings. She died when I was twelve, and these were the only things that I have of her's. One is from her confirmation, one she got on her sixteenth birthday, and the other was her wedding ring." Satine said wistfully, closing her eyes and sighing.  
  
She dabbed her eyes with a hankie and continued to tell the story about the items... "I was raised in a well-to-do family, and I lived very comfortably until my mother's death. She and my father were married against her parent's wishes. You see, my father was the son of a journalist and his mother was a seamstress. When my mother died of consumption, my father and I lived off the inheritance for the next four years. On my sixteenth birthday, I received this diamond necklace from my father. He had spent the very last of our money on a gala in honor of my birthday, but he didn't want me to know. I found out two years later, but before I could talk to my father about it, he died in a carriage accident."  
  
"After his death, I was poor and abandoned. I couldn't live alone, for it was frowned upon, and even if it wasn't, I couldn't afford to do so. I packed up everything that could fetch a price and sold it for only 50 Francs. That was just enough to buy a train ticket to go to Monmartre from Nice. When I got there, Harold and Marie welcomed me and I had a place to live and a job. The rest of the items in there are just stuff from when I was at the Moulin Rouge."  
  
Tears streamed down Satine's face, her mascara running down her cheeks and her makeup flaking, and Christian helped her out of her seat.  
  
"I did so many stupid things when I was young, and now look where I am! I'm hiding from the world so that I can be happy, but I'm not!" she cried as Christian embraced her.  
  
"If none of those things had happened, our love would have never been real. I would be a miserable bachelor, dealing with my father's temper, and you would still be in Nice, living on the streets." Christian said reassuringly.  
  
Satine looked up at Christian with a smile, "I'm ready to go back, Christian. I'm ready to be myself now." 


	6. Christian Pops the Question

The next two weeks were the happiest for Christian and Satine. When they weren't making love or talking about their lives, they were spending time with Toulouse, Satie, and the rest of the gang. Satine's red hair was beginning to grow back, and one day she decided to go to the salon. Meanwhile, Christian and Toulouse took some time to talk.  
  
"Well, so much for our 'Bohemian Revowution', Christian. It seems as though aww we've done is grind ourselves into the dirt." Toulouse said, pouring some absinthe into a glass. "The world just doesn't want to trust us, Toulouse. They're not ready to hear about freedom, beauty, truth, and love." Christian explained. "So how are things between you and Mademoiselle Satine?" "I love her now more than ever. It's as if nothing ever kept us apart, and we've been lovers forever. I want to marry her, Toulouse."  
  
Toulouse set down his glass abruptly and stared at Christian. Then, he smiled. "Wonderfuw! She will say yes! I knew you two would be happy!" He exclaimed as he shook hands with Christian.  
  
Christian beamed from ear to ear, "I'm going to ask her when she returns from the salon."  
  
An hour later, as Christian finished writing a letter to his father, Satine returned. She looked as beautiful as the day she and Christian met. Her spectacular auburn locks were elegantly curled, her makeup was flawless, and her smile was bright.  
  
"Well," she said as she spun around, "What do you think?" Christian smiled, "You're even more beautiful now, my love. We must go celebrate." "Where? We don't have any money! I was lucky enough that Marie still lived nearby so she could dye my hair." Satine exclaimed.  
  
Without saying a word, Christian grabbed Satine's hand and led her upstairs, where Toulouse was throwing a party. Satine smiled and laughed as she and Christian danced together. It was the time of her life. She was beginning to forget about her dreadful past, and she was in love with the handsome, talented Christian.  
  
Before long, she and Christian grew tired of dancing, and they sat down at a table to catch their breath. Christian kissed Satine's hand and looked into her eyes as she smiled.  
  
"There's something I want to ask you." "What is it?" "The only times that I've been happy in my entire life were the times that you and I were together. I know that we can continue to have happy times in the future if you will marry me, Satine."  
  
Satine blinked, and sat back in her seat, surprised. "Will you marry me, Satine?" Christian whispered, getting down on one knee.  
  
Satine looked deep into Christian's eyes, the answer coming to her lips...  
  
TBC 


End file.
